How Will the Mainstream Media Spin This One?

Some scumbag in the college town of Chapel Hill, NC, murdered three Muslims over a parking dispute.

Of course the press would have a field day if the perpetrator was a Tea Party gun nut. But since he instead is a goose-stepping pinkshirt homophile Obamunist, ya gotta wonder: will they just ignore it? Or will they devise some creative technique to make it pay political dividends to their Marxist agenda somehow?

There’s really only two labels they can stick on him over and over and over and over again which are both accurate and don’t contradict the state-approved narrative:

  1. White
  2. Male

But this is the mainstream media, so why should we even entertain the notion they’d attempt to be either accurate or honest? After all, merely calling him a white male doesn’t come nearly close enough to presenting the Greater Truth behind the story! Let’s get creative:

3. Did he ever attend church in his life—even if it was something like Jeremiah Wright’s Sacred Tabernacle of Race War? Then he’s a Christian! A Christian white male.

What’s that you say–he’s an anti-theist? Well we don’t care what kind of theist he is; they’re all dangerous! (Except Jew-hating Muslims, of course.)

4. If not a church, then how ’bout a Bhuddist Temple? A Sikh or Hindu Ashram? A Mosque, like his victims? An Obama rally? Then he’s religious, by gosh. Hmm. “Religious white male.” Doesn’t quite sound marginal enough, does it?

5. Was he ever heard quoting anything from a rule or scientific principle that could be considered fundamental to a field of study or discipline? Then he’s a fundamentalist! Aha, now he’s starting to sound appropriately threatening. But still…

6. We can do better. Did he live or work in a building with long rectangular sections? You know…wings? Could that wing he lived or worked in be considered on the right if you’re facing the building from a certain direction? Then of course HE’S RIGHT-WING, which explains everything!

7. Combine for extra Greater Truth Narrative points! Do both #3 and #6 apply? Then he’s religious right! #1, #2 and #5? Then he’s a white male fundamentalist!

You get the idea. Now get your creative cap on and help the press craft this narrative.